Can you recall a time you felt you were your worst self? Whether some event occurred that caused you to blow your top, or sob your eyes out. When are the times you know you could use some improvement?
For me, it’s when I’m driving. Not only do I hate driving, but I tend to be an impatient driver. I don’t want to be in the car for longer than I have to be, so red lights and people slowing down for no apparent reason sours my mood like sour Skittles. I have a long drive to and from my workplace. On a good day, it takes thirty minutes. On a bad day, it can take over an hour.
My worst self is when I’m in the car, wanting to be home after a long day at work. People who don’t follow the rules of the road or even use their blinker easily gain a hardened look from me. If I have to slam on my brakes because someone who’s in a hurry cuts me off, I have a tendency to growl at them.
I’m trying to do better.
On heavy traffic days, I try to focus on the radio instead of how long the drive is taking. If someone speeds past me and is swerving through the lanes, I try not to grit my teeth, but take a deep breath and think they must have a good reason. Maybe they’re trying to get to a hospital to say goodbye to a loved one? Maybe their baby’s being born? Maybe someone they love is in trouble and they’re trying to get to them? Maybe it’s something more important than just wanting to be home or being late for work? I’m trying to offer a little grace, but it’s going to take a lot work.
So, how about you? When are you your worst self? How do you act when your worst self shows up? Do you growl and call people names like I do in my car? Make bitter remarks or cry your eyes out? What are you doing to help you be better?
nikki diekemper 