You know what’s super exciting to think about? Tomorrow marks the one year anniversary for my website! For an entire year, I’ve been uploading two posts a week! Now, whether or not I’ll be able to continue doing that is up in the air, but I hope you’ll take a moment with me to just be proud about how the past year’s been.
When I started this website–I’ll be honest–I had no idea what I was doing. I just heard that literary agents want aspiring authors to have a platform/following and most authors achieve that by starting their own website. With this and a bit of research, nikkidiekemper.com was born–sooner than expected.
Sooner than expected? Yeah, there’s a funny story behind that. You see, when I was building this website, I didn’t tell anyone. I crafted it in secret and I didn’t really want anyone to know about it. It’s kinda intimidating to think that people I know would get the chance to read my work. Strangers aren’t a big deal, but thinking about the people I know puts a lot of pressure on. I mean, maintaining a website is a tall order! And what if people DON’T like my work? In a couple of days, I had my website all ready for launch. There was content. There was pictures, book reviews, and art. I still needed an author photograph, but that would come with time. All I had to do was hit the button and watch my website put itself out there, but I didn’t.
For a couple of days, I didn’t. I convinced myself that it wasn’t done. It wasn’t ready. I forgetting something. It had to be perfect. Recently, I watched a movie called Letters to Juliet and there was a line in there that struck me. A fact checker wanted to be a writer, but she never submitted any of her work. While she’s out on a hunt for someone’s Romeo, her love interest reads over the current story she’s writing. He ends up telling her that she’s a fantastic writer and she has everything she needs to pursue her dream. So why doesn’t she do it? Her answer is that she never feels like its finished and she’s sort of a perfectionist. The guy’s response is “You know that’s just another way of saying ‘I’m a chicken’?”
That’s what I was doing with my website. I was putting off launching it because I was scared and I wouldn’t even admit it to myself. Then, a day came that I was working on updating one of the pages. It was actually the very same day I started my current job. After editing, I clicked a button to save my work…Well, turns out that button wasn’t what I thought it was. My work was saved–thankfully, but my website was also launched.
I was horrified! I remember sitting there at the computer in shock and wondering if it’s possible to un-launch a website. And, of course, then came the avalanche of thoughts. You know the kind where one little thing gets to you and you’re suddenly swept away in a torrent of anxiousness of “what ifs” and “buts” and “why’s?” I don’t know how to un-launch a website, so instead, I just read everything over again to make sure it was alright. For the first couple months, my site didn’t get a lot of views and that’s because I didn’t know how to put it out there. It’s not as popular as an impatient person like me would like, but you know what? I’m still pretty proud of it. I hope to keep up the written work and I can’t wait to see how things turn out in the end.
Please, allow me to extend my gratitude to everyone who’s followed my site this past year, couple months, or even just a few days. It means a lot to know that people like and read my work. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart and I promise to do my best to keep up the content.