Excuse My Rant

Nowadays, there are so many things that people can go on a tangent about. Be it politics and the state of the government, family drama, work drama, morals, religion, ethics, climate change, right, wrong, and the gray area, or some other topic that forms rifts between friends. Everyone has a subject that will cause them to stand up on their soapbox and spill their opinions to the world. And, if you disagree with them, prepare for an argument. Well, this is me getting up on my soapbox, going on my tangent, ranting, whatever you want to call it. Frankly, it’s been bothering me all summer and like I’ve said before: writing helps me get things off my chest so that’s exactly what I’m doing now. I’d like to apologize in advance if I offend anyone, but I must say my peace.

I HATE MOSQUITOS!

I swear the little buggers are the bane of my existence. I am one of those people who is a primary target of those little bloodsuckers. I’m sure most people have a friend like that. They go outside for a minute and they end up covered in bug bites. Well, that’s me! I can’t tell you how many times I go into the backyard and I have to be on guard to keep mosquitos from biting me. I actually killed three tonight and five the other night that dared land on my skin. I’m too paranoid to go into my backyard anymore because of the mosquitos. They target my legs and their bites itch like my skin is on fire. It’s miserable.

It’s said mosquitos target Type O blood over the others. They’re more attracted to darker clothing. They follow trails of carbon dioxide and heat signatures–so your own breathing and being gives you away. You body odor can attract mosquitos. Depending on the bacteria and compounds on your skin you can smell extra good to the little buggers. One study showed that they’re more attracted to people who drink alcohol, and pregnant women.

While I do wear darker clothing in my downtime, I don’t drink alcohol, I don’t know my blood type, and I’m certainly not pregnant. So I must have the right flavoring on my skin to attract the little vampires. Guess that lines up with what some people tell me: “You’re just too sweet.” Well, I’ll mercilessly kill a mosquito if it gets too close to me–animal lover or not.

I’ve tried taking action against the assault of the buggers. Unfortunately, bug spray only goes so far. I heard creeping red thyme keeps them away, but my green thumb is more of a shade of brown. I purchased a bat house in hopes some would move in, because bats can eat 1000s of mosquitos in a week. I’ve thought about trying to attract those little blue dragonflies I like so much because they eat mosquitos, but that would involve a constant pool of water and mosquitos breed in water. I definitely don’t want to aid the enemy’s numbers. My family heard that lavender repels mosquitos, so there are now serval lavender plants on our back deck. They’ve been helping in making the deck a safe zone, but that still leaves the rest of the yard.

We could get an exterminator out to treat the yard, but frankly, I don’t think it’ll help. Mosquitos like water and there’s plenty of water around my house all because of a neighbor who insists on watering his lawn everyday, all day. Water soaks our yards, rolls down the front of the driveway, and builds up in crevices around the houses. It’s the perfect breeding ground for insufferable mosquitos. We’ve kindly asked the neighbor to stop watering so much, but we’ve yet to see a decrease in the amount of water wasted.

I know there are probably some benefits to having mosquitos. They’re food for bats and other animals, they help pollinate, and probably do other good stuff too. I’d probably appreciate them more if they didn’t try to eat me alive whenever I leave the house! I would wish them to go extinct if they weren’t crucial pollinators for some plant species. So instead, I’ll just wish they’d stop biting me so much! I’d love to go to Africa someday on a safari or to visit the Cheetah Conservation Fund, but I’d probably contract all the diseases down there with how much I get bit.

I dislike a lot of parasites, leeches, and bugs, but mosquitos…I hate ’em.

Thank you for enduring my rant. I hope you found it amusing or educational. If I have offended you in anyway, I apologize. I needed to write my peace and frankly, I feel better. You’re welcome to share your opinions on the little vampires–I mean: mosquitos. Share them here in the comments of this post or in the comments of my Twitter and Facebook pages. Feel free to even share a mosquito story or recommend another idea to help me try and keep the little buggers at bay. I’ll try anything.