People Pleaser

I’m not good at dealing with people
I don’t always say the right thing
My intentions easily get misread
And I wind up feeling a sting

It’s exhausting, dealing with people
Especially if you’re a people pleaser
You try to make everyone happy
And you just feel even weaker

You lend an ear or a helping hand
Try to help all strife disappear
You do your best to understand
How to make everyone’s life easier

The problem with people pleasers
Is they often forget themselves
They’re so busy fretting over others
They can bring harm upon their self

There’s many reasons for the pleasers
They want to be liked.
They want to be loved.
Maybe they’re a type of believer
That thinks they’ll please enough to be hugged?

So be kind to these poor pleasers
And just be pleasant to be around
We all need life to be easier
For together we stand our ground

Sunlight to Starlight

Sunlight
Starlight
I’m waiting for twilight

The sun sets
And night’s on a whim
I’m waiting for you
To know where you’ve been

A hint on the breeze
A note on the wind
I have to believe
We’ll have a chance to begin

A royal display
As the sky burns away
A violet hue with hints of gray

When twilight is around
The sun is fully down
A beautiful view
But it’s still lacking you

Sunlight
To starlight
I was waiting for twilight
But I’m still alone tonight

Rejection is Redirection

Rejections can be hard. Maybe you’re going for a dream job, looking for love, or trying to get approval for your work. You work hard. You think you have a shot and when rejection comes, it can blindside you and dark thoughts start to creep in.

“You’re not good enough. You’ll never amount to anything.”

“Your hard work is for naught. You’ve been wasting your time.”

“No one is ever going to like your work, love you, or accept you.”

But when that fire is there. It’s there for a reason. The future is dark–no one knows what will happen–today is where the light shines. So, what can you do for your dream today?

This morning, I heard something on the radio that drew a tears from my eyes: “Rejection is Redirection.” Basically saying: your dream may have gotten rejected, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t something better down the road. There’s a plan, you just can’t see it.

I’m going to try to hold on to this phrase. Someday, I want to publish my book. I hope to write an awesome fantasy series and share it with the world.

And, so far, I’ve been rejected over 100 times.

Granted, when I started querying I didn’t know what I was doing. I was shooting in the dark without proper knowledge on how to query. When the rejections started pouring in, I learned that my novel wasn’t at the place I thought it was. I learned it again and again and again. So, in a way, a lot of these rejections turned me in the right direction for improvements for my novel. The publishers and agents I’ve been querying likely aren’t the ones in the plan for me. I just haven’t found the right one yet and it’s likely I need these rejections to help me improve my novel before I find that right publisher.

So, when you get rejected, take your time to grieve, but then try to look for the reason. Look for the redirection that will lead you to greater things down the road.

The Distractions of a Writer

I should work on my writing
–I’m going to play with the cat.
I should finish that chapter
–I need to put those dishes away.
I should devise a new description for that forest city
–I started scrolling social after looking something up.
Maybe, at least, write a webpost
–I don’t think I put the laundry away.
I should write. That’s all there is to it.
–Oh, that new movie is out on stream.
Finally, a moment at the computer
–And yet, I’m still playing with the cat.

Where Would I Go?

Daily writing prompt
What countries do you want to visit?
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Where would I go if I could go across seas? I’d be in search of castle on a wide open plain. I’d walk the halls of kings and queens and climb the towers of royalty. I’d wonder what it’d be like to sit on their thrones. But then, I’d survey the ramparts and marvel at the drawbridge. I’d place my steps in the strides of soldiers and knights that defended with their lives. I’d let my mind tell it’s stories. A stable boy with a dream. A maiden with a warrior’s heart. I’d look to the bright sky and imagine the siege of a dragon. Finally, I’d stand atop the castle walls and look out across the plains. When I close my eyes, I’d imagine my kingdom, my country, where my feet can never tread. If only for that moment, high on castle walls, it would be real.

Back in the real world, if I could cross the seas, I’d go to Namibia. The zookeeper in me dreams to see the efforts of the Cheetah Conservation Fund (CCF). See how they save a species by saving a people. Education and programs that benefit all. The world needs the cheetah and the CCF are they champions. Raising dogs to guard livestock, creating jobs to whack down thorny overgrowth encroaching the land, and creating bushblock for fuel. Then, reaching out to stop the illegal wildlife trade. Saving cubs stolen from their mothers. If I could cross the seas, I’d go to Namibia and learn how to do my part to help save the real world.

A Happy Feeling

Daily writing prompt
What notable things happened today?
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The day this was written is not the day it was posted, but when I read this prompt, a specific thing came to my mind. Notable, by Oxford definition, is “worthy of attention or notice; remarkable.” I even pulled out my physical, thick thesaurus just to see what notable compares to. You’ll find outstanding, special, memorable, significant, momentous, and meaningful all next to that word.

So, I would say notable is a pretty big deal.

One would think a birth, a death, a special event, a catastrophe–all those things would be notable. Something that couldn’t be left out if you were telling a story. All those plot points are notable. Reading this definition makes my notable thing seem unworthy, and yet, it was the first thing I thought of.

I was working on my manuscript, going through a chapter at a time and hopefully getting this draft done by my conference next month. It’s been tough going through this latest revision. That haunt shows up in the back of the mind that I’m wasting my time. This revision isn’t going to make it any better. Why do I even bother? All those dark whispering questions that interrupt my writing. And yet, the chapter I was going through today (the day I’m actually writing this and not the day I’m posting it). I barely made a change. I was reading through it and when I got to the end, I actually smiled. I like this chapter. I feel its well written and intense. The pace stays up and you have a lot of action. I actually enjoyed it.

That’s the notable thing that happened. Going through my story and finding a moment where I enjoyed it again and I wasn’t weighed down by the doubts or the “it has to be perfect” anxiety.

That’s something I hope for all writers. Enjoy your story. Don’t stress about it being perfect, enjoy that it’s you.

A Difference

I just want to make a difference.

And know that I contribute.

I want to see improvements

And have the time to do them.

I don’t want to just get by

And repeat the day to day.

I don’t want to just do as I’m told

So you can increase your payday.

I don’t want to see the big picture

When I’m not in the frame.

I don’t want to think of others

When that’s not the reason I get paid.

I want to focus on my charge

And know that you can too

But it’s quite often hard

When I repeat for a year or two.

Just show me that you care

Because my care is worn to the bone.

My not seeing my difference

Leads to actions I should atone.

Tell me why I bother

Show me how you care

I don’t know if I can stand it much longer

It’s like suffocating air.

Drowning Mind

So many words on a page

So many words to write

But when you finally sit down to type

The words just don’t come out right

Talk about this.

Maybe mention that

Your energy is too spent

So all the words are falling flat.

One deep breath in

For a time to wind down.

One deep breath in

Else your mind will drown.

Drown in pressure.

Drown in doubt.

Drown in a way you can’t get out.

But a deep breath

And a promise of sorts

When your mind can breath again

You’ll wield that pen like a sword.

Can’t it Wait a Day?

Can’t it wait a day?

I’ve got far too much to do.

This is just another obstacle in the way.

I don’t know how I’ll make it through.

Must I do this work now?

When it is far better to be outside?

The weather makes you say “wow”

So can’t these tasks just bide their time?

Is it really that important?

To do a never ending list?

Perhaps I should prioritize

And hold fast with an iron fist.

For what’s really important,

Is definitely the here and now

Friends and family warrant

For as much time as you can allow.

So, this task can wait a day

There’s far too much to do.

With my family, I’ll stay

And make a memory or two.

A Need for Silence

Daily writing prompt
How do you know when it’s time to unplug? What do you do to make it happen?
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I often know it’s time to unplug when every notification sound makes me anxious. The phone constantly going off. The computer keeps pinging. When I’m overwhelmed and stressed by those simple noises, I silence everything. I leave the phone in the bedroom. I keep the computer shut down. I keep away from it all and focus on me. What I want to do for a day or even catch up on sleep. Should the weather be nice, I’ll debate going out. Finding a park or going for a quick walk. Sometimes you need to live under a rock for a day or two just to hide away from all the happenings in the world.

I think we all need to prioritize silence in a world as noisy as ours.