Just a Reminder

Because sometimes we need it.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ~ Jeremiah 29:11

“Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.” ~ Ephesians 3:20

“The light shines in the darkness and the darkness can never extinguish it.” ~ John 1:5

“I love you, Lord, you are my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress, my savior. My God is my rock in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.” ~Psalm 18:1-2

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.” ~ Philippians 4:6

Day After Tragedy

The day after tragedy feels like the hardest.

Silence takes the room when you enter.

You don’t look up, but all eyes are on you.

They know that you’re grieving.

They don’t know what to do.

You try to smile. Say it’s okay.

You try to act like it’s any other day.

Condolences are then given.

Kindness brings you to tears.

But you almost wish you had deaf ears.

You want to move on, push through what happened.

You don’t want to acknowledge that your heart is saddened.

You play it over and over.

You wonder what went wrong.

Was there something you should’ve known all along?

But the heavy truth is that it’s done.

Somehow you have to find a way to move on.

And this day after tragedy has its own say.

When something you didn’t know you wanted passed away.

Happy February!

Happy February! Did you make it through the first month of the year okay? Did it fly by or drag out? I felt like it dragged out, but I’ve been dealing with the frigid temperatures that decided to plow on through.

We made it, though! Well done! How’s your New Year’s resolution holding out? Did you make one? I sure didn’t, but I do have my dreams for the year. It’s terrifying to think they might not happen. That rejections may be stalking in the shadows this year, but I’m trying to hold onto hope. Hold onto the knowledge that there’s a plan and know that the timing isn’t up to me.

I’m trying to hold onto hope this year. That things will get better. That dreams will come true. What about you?

Have you got big plans? Big hopes and dreams you want to happen this year? I want you to know that I’m in your corner. I’m rooting for you.

So, even if you had a rough start to the year, there’s still plenty of time to turn things around. Don’t give up hope.

Happy February!

A Curious Kitten

Her earliest memories laid sealed away.

A darkness she didn’t want to awake.

On her own, she grew.

The snowy mountains were all she knew.

She survived. She played.

But, from society, she stayed away.

She didn’t understand the way that they spoke.

Or their buildings, karts, or roads.

She only knew nature and the way of the hunt.

As for money and morals, she knew not.

Then came the adventurers who entered her cave.

To return the fish she had no right to take.

They laughed and welcomed her on their adventure.

But to keep eyes on her, they had to remember.

A curious cat, she liked to wander off.

And see all the things that she had not.

A shiny trinket here. A fascinating thing there.

The good hearted adventurers had to beware.

The curious kitten didn’t know how to pay.

The guards often wanted to take her away.

A handful, the adventurers decided,

Is what this girl is that they had acquired

But out of her cave, and no longer alone.

This curious kitten believed she found home.

Passion’s Depleted

What do you do when passion’s depleted?
When looking at the days ahead fills you with dread?
The monotony of what you once dreamed now makes you impatient and mean.
What do you do when there’s no hope for change?
When the days all remain the same?
When you realize your passion isn’t this way.
What do you do to fix the day?
How do you fight back the tears?
When what you’ve been praying for, for years
Ends up sinking you in fears?
How do you hold back the rage,
When you’re efforts don’t bring change?
What if you’re told something
And found out it’s a lie?
You thought things would be better
But it led to a new problem altogether.
How do you find the strength again,
When struggle is always around the bend?

Beware the Writer

Beware the writer

They hit the pen hard

They draw out their tears

Each line is a scar

Beware the writer

For this is their release

Put it all on the page

Help the pain cease

Beware the writer

With pages of wrong

A way to escape

To help them move on

Beware the writer

For the pen can’t erase

The heart may forgive

But it’s still on the page

Beware the writer

And how you act

For those pages could come back

Takes Your Time

How do you spend most of your time?

When you’re not working or sleeping, what takes your time? Do you participate in hobbies? Do you work on a dream? Maybe you enjoy watching movies or TV shows at the end of a long day? If you had a page for every day of your life, what would be written on it? Accomplishments achieved? Quality time with loved ones? Maybe it would be a lot of wasted time?

I keep a planner of what I do throughout my day. A quick summary of chores, games, or what I did at work that day. I’ll admit, I don’t feel I’ve been using my time wisely. There’s a lot of movie titles I’ve written down from what I watched or rewatched. I wish there was more writing on there. I wish there was more purpose.

You can’t take back time. So, I hope you’ll join in me in making an effort to be more purposeful with it. I think that will be my New Year’s resolution: to be more purposeful.

Favorite Childhood Movie

What is your favorite childhood movie?

We all have that one movie we adored when growing up. Something we watched time and time again and still feel nostalgic watching it now. For me, it’s The Lion King. It’s still my favorite Disney movie to date. So, when Mufasa; The Lion King came out last month, I had to see it. I did love it.

Everyone has their own reasons for picking their favorite movies. Could be they’re funny, could be a quote or the storyline, could be the characters. There’s a million reasons as to why someone would name a movie their favorite. When I tell people my favorite Disney movie is The Lion King, they’re not surprised. I’m a zookeeper. I love animals. Lions are my second favorite animals. Of course I would love The Lion King. However, there’s also a deeper reason.

Everyone knows the story. Simba is deceived into believing he killed his father and he runs away. He’s trapped by guilt and shame and is afraid to face his family again after what he did. He’s wasted the time it takes for a young lion to grow up by eating bugs and avoiding his troubles. He’s lost his way.

One of the major scenes in the movie is Simba looking up to the clouds and being reminded by Mufasa of who he is. He’s the son of a king and he has a purpose in life. With some sense knocked into him, he goes back home to face his past.

Everyone gets into a dark place. We’re deceived by doubt and shame, and we try to avoid our troubles, and possibly our purpose, when they seem too scary or painful to face. I like to look at The Lion King from a Christian perspective. When we lose our way, sometimes we need to be reminded that we’re the children of the King. We all have purpose and we don’t face anything alone. He lives in us, after all.

“He lives in you,
He lives in me,
He watches over everything we see
Into the water
Into the truth
In your reflection
He lives in you”
~”He Lives in You” song lyrics by Lebo M

Hidden in a Folder

Sixteen years ago I started a folder that ended up expanding to several others. As time went on, the folder got buried and the thoughts inside became redundant. I was flipping through that old folder the other day. I found old drafts and musings, drawings and captions, and ideas I once obsessed over. It was all the start of my novel. The baby pages and cringy grammar. The very first map was paired with the first colors of characters. There’s a list of Latin I never actually used. Symbols of a culture are made out on a page. There’s even a note from a family member suggesting a more durable substance for a weapon I drew.

So much I didn’t remember and so much I see grew. There’s the first draft of victory, written in pencil. With each page I turn, I’m grateful the growth I’ve endured. Yet, I miss the days that this folder is from. Such an obsessive writer that little girl was. She wasn’t plagued by the story measuring up. She wasn’t afraid to get it out there, of all the rejections. She just wrote because wanted to. She wanted a story that grew.

I will say there are some things that shouldn’t come out of this folder. I dropped my jaw at a note that I read. Apparently, one of my characters had a hidden crush. That’s not going to happen, and that’s enough said.

I wonder what other gems are hidden in my folders? What notes can I use? What other pictures did I forget I drew? Maybe there’s something to reignite the passion anew?

An Old Video Game

It’s a curious thought when a memory comes to mind. It lingers and lingers until you give it some time. A childhood game. On an older game system. You decide to dust it off, see if it says “press start to continue.”

You untangle the wires and untangle its kinks. Decide to stock up on the games. You can retry them all, you think. There’s one in particular you hope will start, but it’s so worn out. Scratches keep it dark. Between other games, you try it again and again, hoping for a glimpse of the menu screen again.

Just one more game. I’ll try this one and that one. You rotate the disks, try different stages. Chip the rust off your fingers as you soar through the levels. You’re bound and determined to beat the NPCs, and find the ultimate lifeform makes everything a breeze.

The nostalgia is sweet and you’ve a smile on your lips. You don’t mind the joystick even as your thumb gets sore. It’s worth all the pain to get the high score. Low and behold, it’s suddenly late in the night. You’ve stayed up like you used to and you didn’t even think twice. It’s only when you decide you’re too tired to play–your movements are sloppy, button time is delayed–it’s finally time to hit the sack, else you risk coming in last.

But what a night to carry into dreams.  Stories and memories from too long ago, it seems. A change of pace and a break from the same. That’s what you find in an old video game.